FOR WOMEN ONLY
Dr S Tabula
Cheapest & Cures
Is your husband having an affair you suspect
Is he weak in bed
Is he stingy with money
Is there somebody jealous with your relationship
Do you want to get married and things are delaying
Do you have bad period pains, lots of blood or no blood at all
Do you have vaginal problems
Do you have any stomache pains plus all old people sickness
Like legs, back, joint, chest
NB: Doctor also works on bad luck, court cases, kids, employment business many more
Cell: 078 216 5761
Consultation Fee R30.00
That’s an actual flyer I got in the mail (and I see similar ones all the time). I am not allowed to write what the top half of the flyer said. I will only tell you the Title of that section: FOR MEN ONLY.
I had a young guy pray for me in a charismatic church. The problem is that charismatic people tend to pray for a long time. Normally this is ok, but it was combined with two other troubling habits when mixed together:
He had a SOS-Saliva Overproduction Syndrome.
And he stuttered.
So he would be praying for me and he would say,
“The Lord wants to to to to to to to to to to to to to---“
Now, at about this time with all the spraying, the wind was blowing through the room and you know how that can chill you when you are wet. Plus I wanted to dry off. So I try to think of words to help him.
“The Lord wants to to to to to to to to to to to to to to---“
“Ta ta a ta TAKE you tacitly to town to to to to to to to to to to to to ---“
I’ve really got to stop this, I think. So I try to help out, again, thinking what would be good to say.
“Ta ta a ta TAKE you tacitly to town to to to to to to to to to to to to---“
“To Touch touch to touch all his People in the CiTy CenTre.”
This is NOT working. I wondered why I was so silly to think of words to finish his that began with nasty sounds like the sound from the letter ‘t.’ What I should have done was think of nice neutral sounds. Uh-huh. So the next time I try to think or a nice word that can remind me of my younger days at WaterWorld or SplashTown (water theme parks).
“Jeeeeesus wants to know YOU in the intimate places in yo yo yo yo your life. He wants to to to to to to to to to to to to---“
“Trot. He wants you to trot to his throne room and take intimate time with him each each each each each each each each each each each” The ch’s were killing me. “each each each each ----“
“Time Each each Time. Time to talk, Time to be tacit, time to t. . . .”
And on it went. It actually was short, but I gave up trying to think of words. I was amazed at his mind’s ability to reject suggestions that didn’t use enough saliva and to immediately come up with synonyms or similar words that overused globs of saliva that seemed to have been formed for me, waiting for me before my birth. It was like he was inspired by God to spit on me. I’m sure it didn’t happen like that, but my imagination runs away with me.
I’m back in
I have been officially invited to speak at an HIV/AIDS rally in the
It’s always strange when I realize how a lot of stuff is US-centric. So I’m at this children’s ministry conference this weekend (Feb 29 – March 1). And I was reading one of the books for sale about dealing with kids. The entire first chapter was dedicated to kids in the
I received a not-so-good e-mail from the head of an organization I’m about to endorse. So it’s somewhat strange. Regardless of his e-mail, I do need your help. I had to think about this before sending it because, in all honesty, this is not a long-term or root solution. But at the same time that we seek to right wrongs and injustices and inequalities in our world by addressing root issues we still have to deal with the present-day symptoms. That’s why I currently support BOGO.