Sunday, August 1, 2010


I came back last weekend from Philly, and I didn’t want to think. I got the projector and hooked it up to my laptop and watched the first two weeks of The Bachelorette. Monday I watched another two weeks and another two weeks on Tuesday. I eventually saw all the episodes by Friday and I learned a few things about why the show is fake

1) The bachelor or bachelorette feels the need to give a negatively constructive reason for why someone was let go completely annihilating the idea that you can have four good options and just be forced to choose 3 and nothing be bad with the 4th. There seems to be no understanding that there is more than one good fit in life (especially if there is real love [not the emotion]).

2) People, today, do date multiple people at the same time, but the multiple people, whom a girl dates, usually don’t know each other. Ouch!

3) The extreme love some of them feel for each other is probably an emotion and fleeting at best. Real love isn’t emotive; moreover, if I and a rock were in those intensely romantic situations and locations like Lisbon and Tuscany, I too would fall in love with that rock, making rock and roll. They should rather have the couples practice living normal lives, going to work, cleaning a house, co-managing trips and households. That’ll show ‘em! ;-)

4) Those men told the bachelorette that she was beautiful every time they saw her. I’m not sure that would happen in real life. It’s a good practice, but I don’t know if the guys are that good in a daily real situation.

But I was mesmerized because I was LEARNING about women while watching. It was a free lesson and I couldn’t help but learn. This is what I learned (more important than the silly objections above). I studied Ali, the bachelorette, and these are some of the generalizations I made and saw.

1) Women want to be pursued.

2) Women like to be touched and held.

3) Women want to be loved, adored, and appreciated, told they’re beautiful.

4) Women want to feel secure.

If you don’t provide this for a woman, it can have repercussions. Even in a silly show like that. I looked back at all the relationships I’ve had (what relationships!), and I can see where those were not provided and how it altered the relationship eventually unto the end. It’s sad and frightening and freeing and sad. You stand and face loss in the face, analyzing.

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